Where's my Hero
by RikaChieko
Summary: Everyone needs a hero sometimes, even other heros, right? -fluff-


'Fuck…' Alfred thought to himself as an all too familiar feeling began making itself known. 'Not now… Not again…" He put one of his large hands to his chest and began rubbing the expanse of flesh beneath it, try to rid himself of the pain that grew there. Air became harder and harder to obtain as the seconds dragged by and his hands were tingling in an extremely annoying way.  
>He gave a heavy sigh and prepared to brace himself against his bed frame. He knew that in a few short moments he'd get dizzy and begin to swim in his own head. After that he is chest and arms would begin to shake and he'd start to sweat even though the air around him was nice and cool.<br>'Why?' Alfred asked who ever was out there listening to his thoughts as his predictions came true with such force he almost fell down. 'Why do I have to be alone? Where's my hero?'  
>Those were questions Alfred had been asking himself for a very long time now. Since these stupid anxiety attacks, or whatever the hell they were started. Right after the Revolutionary War. Right after he'd lost Arthur, his former care taker and his secret love.<br>Thoughts of him flooded Alfred's mind. He thought of all the times he'd shared with Arthur when he was younger. Again and again he saw a much younger version of himself sitting on Arthur's warm, comfortable lap as Arthur read aloud his favorite fairy tales. He could almost feel the Arthur's breath on his ear and his arms wrapped around him, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn't hear Arthur's loving voice.  
>Instead Alfred heard Arthur's pain filled words and the sobs that threatened to take them from him as they echoed through his head. "I can't d-do it. I-I can't shoot you!" played again and again in his head.<br>Each time he heard them was like a stake in his heart, adding to the pain he already felt there. Each word bringing more and more tears to his eyes. Alfred tried his damnedest to keep the water from spilling over, but failed.  
>His already short breath became even more shallow as he tried to choke back his sobs and his broad shoulders began to shake.<br>Alfred knew he didn't deserve a hero. Not after what he'd done to the one person who'd cared most about him. He'd left him there to die after he'd won his independence. And honestly, at the time, Alfred didn't give a shit what happened to the other man.  
>He had thought he'd been prepared to not have Arthur in his life. He'd thought he was strong enough to be okay on his own. And of course, he did make it on his own, and was now the superpower of the world.<br>But to the rest of the world, he looked like an overly happy, arrogant, bastard he'd always been. Though that was what he wanted them to think. Alfred longed to hide his pain from the world. He didn't want them to know that when he'd lost Arthur, he'd lost himself.  
>Alfred shook his head vigorously, trying to shake the thoughts from his head. He sighed a heavy, shaky sigh and pulled off his now damp shirt. 'Thank God it's night this time around.' he thought and fell back against the bed with a heavy <em>thunk. <em>He pulled one of his pillows, his favorite blue one, and placed it under his head and stared blankly at the wall as he began to calm down. The pillow was cool and help with his head ache, and Alfred honestly didn't care that it was already damp in a large spot where his tears, which still flowed easily down his face, hit the pillow.  
>After what felt like forever, his heavy eye lids finally closed, and he was whisked away to Dream Land. There Arthur didn't hate him and everything was just perfect. There he was really happy.<p>

When Alfred awoke the next morning he had trouble opening his sore and swollen eyes. But his head ache was gone and he was ready to face the day with his signature 'hero smile' on his face. Well as ready as he would ever be.  
>Alfred rolled onto his back and took a deep breath before he threw his arms over his head then back beside his legs, letting his upper body go with them. "Hmph." he grunted as he stretched the stiffness from his back and shoulders. "Well…" Alfred spoke out loud. "Time to get going." he said and stood slowly and started his journey to his awaiting shower so he could start his morning.<br>As he trudged to the shower, he passed the mirror on his dresser and noticed he was still wearing the kakis he'd worn to work yesterday. He hated having to dress up, but he'd had to see his boss yesterday to get his assignments for today and the weekend. Fortunately enough, he'd, more or less, was given today off. All he had to do was spend the day with Ludwig, Feliciano, Kiku, Mattie, and Arthur.  
>The thought of spending the day with Arthur, the real Arthur, not the one in his dreams, made Alfred want to crawl under his covers and sleep the day away. But of course, he couldn't. The president had made it very clear that he was to not only show up today, but be nice to <strong>everyone<strong>. And you can't really say no to the president.  
>So instead of going back to his bed, which seemed to call out to him, Alfred forced himself to get climb into the shower and take a nice, long, warm shower. Once in the shower, Alfred stood directly under the shower head and let the hot water cascade down his body. He could feel his still taunt muscles start to relax and gave a loud, happy groan before shampooing his hair.<br>He smiled to himself just a little when he saw the label on his shampoo. On the bottle there was a big red, white, and blue sticker that read in bold font "HERO". It'd been a birthday gift from Feliciano, and apparently he'd special ordered it just for Alfred. It even smelt like his favorite cologne, Patriot. Feliciano was actually a really nice guy, and had was now a pretty good friend to Alfred.  
>Alfred gave a small chuckle and flipped open the cap with a little <em>click<em> and squeezed a glob of the blue jell with little white scent beads into his waiting hand. 'I can't wait to see Feliciano and Mattie. I haven't seen them in a while, have I?' Alfred asked himself as he lathered and rinsed his hair. 'What time is it anyways…?' His face scrunched as he tried to recall what time it was when he got up, and failed. Alfred just shrugged and hurried to finish his shower.  
>Alfred pulled on his star-spangled boxers and towel dried his hair as he ran over to the night stand his digital clock was. He turned the clock to face him with a flick of the risk and took his first look at the time.<br>The awful glowing red numbers on the screen read 11:47, which meant he'd slept through his 9 a.m. alarm. When Alfred remembered the time at which he was suppose to meet up with the others, his mouth dropped open. He was already more than 15 minutes late and was at least a 20 minute drive to the dinner his group were meeting at.  
>"Fuck!" Alfred yelled and ran to his dresser and threw open the middle two drawers and pulled out his favorite tee-shirt and pair of jeans. He quickly slid the shirt over his head and hopped back to the nightstand to where his cell phone, iPod, wallet and keys sat.<br>Alfred paused only for a moment to button his comfortable jeans and gather all of the things he'd need for the day in one hand before he ran down his stairs and out the door. He fiddled with the many items in his hand, shoving everything other than his keys into his pocket and locked his front door.  
>Alfred was in his car and had it running in no time flat. He peeled out of the driveway and started driving as fast as he could without getting stopped by a cop. He was kicking himself all the way there for being stupid enough to sleep through his alarm on today of all days.<br>'Only five more minutes.' Alfred told himself, trying to fight off the episode that he knew was coming. He could feel the tingling growing stronger and stronger in his hands and the pain in his chest growing more intense. But Alfred couldn't afford to have his friends, the other nations, see him like that. So Alfred took and deep breath and willed his breathing to slow, just enough so that he didn't shake. He tried not to let his hands shake and he tried not to let his face flush.  
>'Only three more minutes.' Alfred told himself.<p>

"Where the hell is that git?" Arthur complained to the other four men sitting with him at the dinner they'd been forced to meet at. "God he's always late!"  
>"I'm sure he has a reason, ve!" Feliciano said, half-heartedly defending his friend. But even he was bored from waiting for the American man for nearly and hour.<br>"It'd better be a damn good one." Ludwig said as he stared off into space.  
>"I-I'm sure it is. I have faith in him…" The quietest of the group, Mattie whispered so that he was barely audible.<br>"Sure it is! And we're about to get a presiden-" Arthur started, but was cut off by the missing part of their party.  
>"HEY dudes! I'm soooo sorry that I'm late. I totally slept through my alarm this morning. Totally not hero like, right?" Alfred greeted as he jogged over to the table where the people he was to spend the day with sat. Alfred tried to control his breathing, becoming somewhat self conscious at the concerned stares three four of the five men already there were giving him.<br>There was a long silence before anyone spoke. Even Arthur was stunned at Alfred's appearance. "Alfred, ve?" Feliciano said, breaking the quiet. "Are you okay? Did you stay up all night playing video games again, ve?" He asked, concern filling his big amber eyes.  
>"No way dude! I went to bed early! Why would you ask?" Alfred asked, flashing a big smile Feliciano's way, hoping to ease his worries about him.<br>"Well you've got purple-y circles under your eyes, ve."  
>That's when Mattie chimed in, always concerned for his twin brother. "Yeah, bro. You don't look so good." He told Alfred as he stood and crossed over to where Alfred stood.<br>"Don't worry about it dudes! I'm fine!" Alfred said, trying to convince the others that he was alright.  
>"I don't think so, eh." Mattie said to Alfred as he put a hand to Alfred's sweaty forehead. "Maple! You're really warm bro. Are you sure you're feeling okay?"<br>"Yes! I'm fine alright!" Alfred snapped at Mattie and immediately regretted doing so. He could see the hurt behind Mattie's glasses and tried to make it better. "Mattie. I'm sorry, bro. Lets order something to eat!" He said apologetically to Mattie before turning to the rest of the group. "Lunch is on me dudes!" He exclaimed happily before stepping around Mattie to slid into the booth they were seated at. Unfortunately, he got stuck between Mattie and Arthur after Mattie slid into the booth immediately after Alfred.  
>The group, which had been ready to order about an hour ago, was egger to get their food and the table was completely silent as they waited for their food. Though the silence was easy and comfortable, but Alfred was uncomfortable. He could feel Mattie staring at him, which was only making the pain in his chest worse and his hands, which he'd cleverly hid in his lap, shake more. It was getting harder to keep his breathing fairly normal and his chest mostly still.<br>When the food got there, Alfred found he wasn't hungry and only nibbled at the burger he'd ordered. Everyone else at the table, even Feliciano, ate everything they'd been presented with.  
>Once they were finished Alfred waved down the waitress, who had obliviously been flirting with him, that was serving them. The girl saw Alfred and stuck her pen in her dirty blonde hair, and skip happily over to the group. "Hey there, are you guys all done?" She asked cheerfully, giving them a big smile.<br>"Yeah. Thanks… Hannah!" Alfred thanked their waitress, pausing to read the name off her nametag, which made the girl blush just a little.  
>"Sure, no problem! Can I get you a box for that while I run and get you're check?" She asked, drawing attention to the half eaten burger on Alfred's plate.<br>"Totally! Thanks!" Alfred thanked the girl quickly as she skipped away. A moment of silence fell over the group before Mattie spoke.  
>"Alfred. You are not okay."<br>"Yeah, ve." Feliciano said nodding.  
>"I agree." Kiku spoke up.<br>"Mmmm…" Ludwig grunted in agreement. Alfred was cornered. Everyone was turning against him. This was totally not helping with the whole pain thing.  
>"Look, dudes, I'm fine! Why don't you guys just go wait outside while I get the check. I'll be out there in a couple minutes." Alfred told them, going from yelling to pleading in a matter of three sentences. The four men exchanged a few glances before hesitantly obeying Alfred's orders.<br>All but one of them were gone, and Alfred had long since forgotten the silent man sitting beside him. Alfred let out a long, shaky sigh before inhaling deeply several times, letting his shoulders shake as he desperately tried to take in oxygen. A sudden wave of dizziness hit Alfred like a ton of bricks and sent him swaying. He closed his eyes tight and tried to will the feeling away.  
>A cold, boney hand clapped down on Alfred's shoulder, jolting him back to reality. Alfred jumped and turned to see who's hand it was on his shoulder. He opened his eyes and stared at the person connected to the hand and brilliant green eyes stared back at him.<br>"Alfred…" An extremely concerned Arthur said slowly as if he was unsure of who he was talking to. Alfred groaned in reply, unable to find his voice.  
>"Alfred, are you okay? What's wrong?" He asked, his voice dripping with concern. It'd been a long, long time since Arthur had spoke to him in such a way and it made Alfred happy.<br>"I- ummm… Well…." Alfred struggled to find the words to say. He had no idea how he could explain what was wrong with him to Arthur.  
>"Come on, use your big boy words." Arthur said jokingly and rolled his eyes.<br>"I'll be fine. I'm use to this by now, trust me." Alfred said, looking away from Arthur.  
>"Use to this? Alfred, you git, it looks like you can't breath!" Arthur exclaimed, shock evident on his face, "You're all red and sweaty, even though its freezing in here, and you can barely keep your self upright! Why are you use to this!"<br>"Its happened a lot for a long time alright? Can we just leave it at that?" Alfred asked, his eyes pleading as they looked into Arthur's. "Why are you even talking to me anyways? You hate me remember?" He said, now desperate to get away and re-join the others where he could pretend to be okay.  
>"I never said I hated yo-" Arthur tried to say, but was cut off.<br>"Bull shit." Alfred said and stood up to go and find the waitress with the check.  
>Arthur stood slowly, still worried about the nation he'd raised. Alfred still swayed as he walked and his shoulders shook as he spoke with the waitress. 'What could have caused him to be like this?' Arthur wondered as he walked out of the dinner to go and find Canada.<p>

It only took Arthur a moment to find Mathew and he walked quickly over to him. "Mattie, I need to talk to you about Alfred."  
>"Why? Is he okay?" Mattie asked, looking worried.<br>"I said he would be. But that's not what I'm concerned about. Apparently, he has spells like that often." Arthur said quickly to Mattie, his voice a whisper.  
>"I know. He won't talk about it. He tries to pretend that its not happening, but apparently he knows how to deal with it, they started after the war." Mattie told Arthur, filling him in.<br>"What?" Arthur asked, unable to process the fact that maybe, just maybe, Alfred hadn't indeed been completely better off after the war.  
>"Yeah. And t-that's not all. Alfred's been having nightmares too." Mattie said, not noticing that Alfred was standing right behind him. Arthur also had been so involved with his conversation with Mattie, he hadn't noticed the large man looming over the Canadian either.<br>"Wow, bro. You totally know a lot about me that I didn't tell you!" Alfred said, calling attention to himself. "And how heroic of you to tell Arthur all about it!"  
>"Alfred!" Mattie shouted out of shock. Well, his voice reached a volume of that of a normal person. "I'm sorry. But I'm concerned about you and maybe he can help". Alfred glared down at the little man.<br>"I don't need any fucking 'help' Mattie! Especially not from him!" Alfred yelled at Mattie, making him shake slightly, before turning abruptly and starting to walk away.  
>"Alfred, you wanker!" Arthur yelled, "Get back here and apologize"! Alfred stopped for just a moment, visibly tensing, before continuing towards the three nations who had just witnessed the whole event. He stopped in front of them a forced a large smile to his face.<br>"Sorry about that dudes!" Alfred apologized. His chest shaking worse than before as he tried to suck in an adequate amount of oxygen. His fists trembled violently at his sides. "I've really gotta go or I'm going to break somebody! And that totally wouldn't be heroic at all"! He yelled before walking stiffly to his car and got in. Seconds later, Alfred's expensive looking car speed off down the street.  
>The nations all stood in silence for a few moments before Feliciano spoke up. "I wonder if he's gonna come back, ve".<br>"I'm sure the git will." Arthur said, rolling his eyes. "He's never been good at controlling his anger."  
>"Ja. I can see zhat." Ludwig observed in his normal, flat voice. "Lets go to the bar down the street. He can find us there."<br>"That's a great idea Ludwig!" Feliciano exclaimed and threw his arms around Ludwig's neck. A small blush formed on Ludwig's as he shook off the little brunette man.  
>"Alright." Arthur agreed and the group started down street to what Alfred had described as a classy bar.<p>

After spending about an hour at the bar that Arthur had been plesently surprised by the true classy-ness about it, the two of the five nations there were completely drunk. The other three could either hold their liquor very well or hadn't touched the stuff and were trying their hardest to put up with the two drunk ones.  
>Feliciano and Kiku were talking animatedly about this and that in the booth next to the one Ludwig, Mattie and Arthur were situated in. Mattie stared into the beer in front of him as he nervously rubbed the cool metal. He was quite obviously worried about Alfred, more so than the two men he sat with. Arthur took notice to Mattie's ever growing concern and tried to comfort him.<br>"Alfred's fine, Mattie." He said reassuringly, "He's a big boy. The git can take care of himself."  
>"Aren't you worried about him at all?" Mattie asked Arthur, not looking up from his drink. "I've never seen him shake like that…"<br>"Of course I'm worried the wanker, but I know he'll be fine." Arthur told Mattie as he place a caring hand on Mattie's. "I learned from experience remember"? Mattie was taken aback by not the comment itself, but the pain he heard behind the words. Right then and there, a light bulb went off in the smart little Canadian's head.  
>He looked up at Arthur over the rim of his glasses with a big smile on his face. "I get it now."<br>"You get what? And stop looking at me like that! It's super creepy you git." Arthur asked, trying to ignore the chills that ran down his spine from the look on Mattie's face.  
>"You love him too." Mattie said bluntly.<br>"Vhat?" Ludwig asked, joining in the conversation.  
>"What he said!" Arthur yelled, surprised by the tenacity of the comment.<br>"You love him!" Mattie said louder and pushed his glasses further up his nose. "You love Alfred like he loves you!"  
>"WHAT!" Arthur roared as his heart started to race. "I don't love that stupid wanker! And he sure as hell doesn't love me!"<br>"Yes he does. It all makes sense now." Mattie said matter-of-factly, "Those things started when he took you out of his life. That's why cries in his sleep and says your name."  
>"It does make some sense, Arthur." Ludwig said, taking Mattie's side. "And you obviously still care about him very much".<br>"NO I DON'T!" Arthur screamed, screwing his eyes shut to keep the tears that had, for some reason, begun to pool in his emerald eyes from spilling over. "I DON'T LOVE ALFRED! IF ANYTHING I HATE THAT STUPID GIT"!  
>The table fell deathly silent for a long moment. Seconds ticked by as Arthur waited for a rebuttal which wasn't coming.<br>The silence was broken by a word that made Arthur's eyes snap open and guilt flood his being. "Alfred…" Mattie whispered so quietly that Arthur wasn't sure he'd heard him right. But sure enough, he slowly raised his head and was met by a pair of brilliant blue eyes filled with pain and tears.  
>"Good to fucking know." Alfred said as his chest fill with two different kinds of excruciating pain. His hands trembled and he had to force himself not to gasp for air as he turned on his heel and walked as quickly as he could threw the small crowd on the dance floor to the men's bathroom.<br>Alfred yanked the wooden door that lead to the bathroom and entered the cool, clean smelling air, quickly closing the door and locking it behind himself. He jiggled the knob a few times, just to be sure it was truly locked before he sunk to the floor gasping for air as big tears flowed down his red cheeks. He knew that Arthur hated him. He was very, very aware of that fact, but his kindness to him earlier that day had made him unsure of that fact. And to hear Arthur scream that he hated him had crushed his hopes and his heart all over again.  
>Alfred wished silently to himself as the world around him began to spin viciously that no one would come so he could just die here.<p>

"Oh bloody fucking hell…" Arthur cursed at himself as he watched Alfred push through the crowd on the dance floor. His heart ached and his mind went blank. He'd just hurt the person he cared for the most in the world so horribly and now he was too much of a coward to go after him.  
>"Fuck!" Arthur cursed loudly as he finally admitted to himself that he did care for Alfred. "I'm so stupid!" He yelled at himself for not realizing that what Mattie had said was right. For not realizing that he did love Alfred, that he wanted Alfred in his by his side all the time, even though such a thing would be impossible.<br>"Mattie, I have to go after him don't I?" Arthur asked, looking down at an incredibly angry nation.  
>"Maple fucking yes you do! If Alfred didn't love you, your ass would be grass bitch! You just figured out that you love him, eh! After you crush his heart, eh!" Mattie screamed at Arthur, grabbing roughly him by the collar of his shirt. Arthur and Ludwig both stared bewilderedly at the usually mute nation after his burst of rage. Neither of them had ever heard him speak anywhere near that volume and were stunned by it. "Well what are you waiting for!" Mattie yelled as he pushed Arthur back. "Go fix it ass hole"!<br>Arthur was snapped from his daze by the shove Mattie had given him and quickly turned to run to the bathroom which Alfred had taken sanctuary in. He stopped mid-step and turned on his heel to face Mattie again. "Do you have a bobby pin?" He asked the nation.  
>"Yeah. Why?" Mattie asked confused as he pulled two pins from his bangs, setting them free to hang in his face.<br>"There's a lock on the bathroom door." Arthur explained shortly before taking off towards the bathroom.  
>After wrestling through the ever growing crowd on the dance floor that separated him from Alfred, Arthur finally reached the door that kept him from the man whom he'd hurt. He gave a heavy sigh to prepare himself before pounding on the wooden door. "Alfred!" He called out, but got no reply. "Alfred!" He cried out, more desperately this time, "Let me in damn it"! Arthur paused for a moment, listening hard for some sort of answer. Alfred's voice, the lock clicking, the shuffling of feet, anything. When he heard nothing he grabbed the door knob and tried his hardest to turn it.<br>Arthur's attempt to open the door failed and he was forced to use his last resort plan. He was going to pick the lock.  
>"Alfred, if you aren't going to open this damn door, I'm going to open it for you!" He called out as he dropped to his knees, taking one of the bobby pins in his hand and put it in his mouth so he could use both hands for his task. He inserted the little black bit of wire into the key hole and started to move it around with expert ease. In his days as a privateer, he'd done this almost everyday and the task now seemed extremely simple. It only took him a few seconds for the tumblers in the lock to click open.<br>Arthur grabbed and turned the door knob as quickly as he could so that Alfred couldn't lock the door once again. He tried to push the door open, but it was obvious that on the other side of the door, Alfred was pushing against it to keep him out. After a minute or so of pointless struggling, Arthur cried out in frustration. "Alfred, open this bloody door right now!" He yelled, knowing that he would never be able to force it open with the much stronger man on the other side trying to keep him out. But that didn't stop Arthur from trying.  
>After a few more minutes of pushing as hard as he possibly could, Arthur had just about reached his limit. He was just about to release the door and just wait until Alfred had to come out when big, pale arms began to push against the expanse of the door beside him. Arthur looked up and was shocked to see Ludwig trying to help him open the door.<br>"Ludwig?" He inquired.  
>"The door is unlocked, ja?" He asked in response, an intense look of concentration on his face.<br>"Yeah. But why are you helping me?" Arthur asked, bewildered that Ludwig of all people was assisting him.  
>"Feliciano wants Alfred to be happy. And you aren't that bad of a person yourself." He answered, still pushing against the door with all his might.<br>"Oh…" Arthur said, shocked. He had no clue what to say, so instead of talking, he pushed harder against the door and saw it open about an inch and a half. The progress inspired Arthur to push harder and all at once the door flew open. Once he'd regained his balance from the face plant he'd just narrowly avoided taking, he looked over to where Ludwig was standing to thank him and was shocked to see that he was no longer there.  
>So he returned his attention to the open door and making things right with the man was just beyond it. Arthur walked slowly and nervously into the brightly lit room, taking extra time and care to turn and shut the door before turning to face Alfred. He had expected to a very pissed off nation standing there, spewing threats of nuclear war fare to obliterate them all, but instead found Alfred sitting on the tile floor. One of his trembling hands rubbing his shaking chest, the other supporting him as swayed while sweat ran down his flushed face.<br>Alfred looked as though he was on his death bed as he sat there, and that shook Arthur to core. He'd never seen the brilliantly strong young hero look so weak and vulnerable. He honestly want to turn and bolt from the little room he was so scared, but he could see that Alfred needed him now more than ever. So Arthur walked cautiously over to where Alfred was sitting not wanting to scare him, seeing as Alfred hadn't seemed to notice his presence yet.  
>Just as cautiously and slowly, Arthur kneeled down in front of Alfred and moved to put his hand on his shoulder, but jerked it back when Alfred's shoulders and chest heaved as he gasped desperately for air. Alfred began to pant shallowly, sounding as if he was in pain, making Arthur even more scared than he had been before. He had to help him, but first he had to get his attention.<br>"Alfred…" Arthur whispered softly, worry lining the simple word.  
>"Go away." Alfred snapped weakly. "I'm f-fine." Alfred lied just before his shoulders and chest heaved as his body tried to suck in more air and his face scrunched up in pain. "I swear."<br>"If you die now, you're going to hell. You know that right?" Arthur said faking sarcasm.  
>"What the fuck?" Alfred asked Arthur as he raised his head so he could glare at the older man. He was shocked to see the amazing emerald eyes that met him were not filled with contempt, but filled with fear and concern.<br>"You just swore on a lie…" Arthur whispered as watched Alfred gasp once again for precious air. His longed to just take all of Alfred's pain away and suffer it himself, but knew he couldn't do that. So he did the only he could think to do.  
>"Can you stand?" He asked. And of course, Alfred being Alfred, took the simple question as a challenge and struggled until he'd gotten himself on his own two feet, swatting Arthur's hand away when he stood and offered it to the proud American man. All of Alfred's effort was soon wasted when he swayed and nearly went tumbling back to the hard, cold floor. He'd been lucky that Arthur had been close enough to catch him before that happened.<br>Arthur stumbled under the larger man's weight, but managed to walk himself and Alfred over to the granite sink. And in one swift motion lifted Alfred onto it, not bother to ask permission from the other man, knowing he'd try to and do it himself. As soon as Alfred was situated on the cool stone, he leaned his head back to the wall, glad that he didn't have to support himself anymore as he once again took a deep, desperate gasp for oxygen. It was followed by an intense wave of dizziness that sent him reeling forward as his stomach flipped.  
>Alfred let a small gasp when his head his Arthur's collar bone. "Why are you still here?" He asked as he panted.<br>"Why do you think I'm here?" Arthur asked rhetorically, "I'm here to beg for forgiveness".  
>"Forgiveness?" Alfred tried to ask as a sudden gasp shook his entire body.<br>"Yes". Arthur started to rub Alfred's back trying to clam the big man. "I'm so sorry Alfred".  
>"Sorry for what?" Alfred asked sadly. "I know you hate me. I've known that for a long time."<br>Arthur's eyes went wide and his mouth dropped open just a little bit at hearing Alfred say that. Alfred really did believe that he hated him. 'Fuck.' He thought, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment before opening them again. Arthur calmly put one of hands on Alfred's chin as he shook under his hand on his back and pushed up, forcing Alfred to look him in the eyes.  
>"Don't ever let me hear you say that again." He commanded. Alfred was shocked at the forcefulness of the words and the seriousness in Arthur's eyes. He couldn't really not hate him, could he?<br>"But it's the truth." Alfred protested weakly. He watched Arthur tense for a moment and prepared himself for a scolding. He gave a little yelp when, instead giving him harsh words, Arthur pulled Alfred closer and put kissed a very America. The sweet innocent kiss was broken after a only a short few seconds when Alfred pulled away to gulp in air, throwing one of his hands to his pained chest.  
>"No its not." Arthur confessed, "Alfred I was just lying to myself and everyone else out there. Al, I love you. A lot. And I'm sorry for acting like such a bloody wanker to you". Upon hearing those sweet words from the man he loved, Alfred let himself cry the tears, partially from pain, partially from joy, slide silently down his warm cheeks. He looped his arms around Arthur's neck and pulled Arthur closer, burying his face in Arthur's chest.<br>"I-I love you too, old man." He force out as he took another hugely deep breath. Alfred slid his hands from their place on Arthur's neck to his shoulder blades, gripping furiously at the fabric there, riding out the shock wave of pain in his upper body.  
>Arthur again grew worried as he felt Alfred shake violently as he gasped for air. "Alfred, are you okay love?" he asked, unsure of what to do to help the American.<br>"Y-yeah. I will be… B-but…" Alfred said hesitantly, wanting to ask a favor of Arthur, but too embarrassed to do so.  
>"What is it Alfred?" Arthur asked, honestly willing to do anything to make his love feel better.<br>"C-could you tell me a story?" He asked against Arthur's chest. Arthur couldn't help but chuckle at the innocent request.  
>"Of course Alfred, I'll tell you fairy tales until you all better, okay?" He said, smiling down at Alfred's tuft of bright blonde locks as he nodded against his chest. "But, there is one condition love."<br>"What?" Alfred asked, his words muffled adorably by Arthur's shirt.  
>"You be my boyfriend".<br>"S-sounds… good…" Alfred forced out as the pain in his breast intensified once again.  
>"Thank you." Arthur said happily, "I've always wanted a hero for a boyfriend."<br>"I'm not a hero. No hero is this weak." Alfred said, his words filled with spite.  
>"Yes, you are a hero. Everyone is weak at some point, Alfred. Even hero's need a hero every now again love." Arthur told Alfred in an attempt comfort him. He took a long pause, waiting for Alfred to reply. When he did Arthur decided to go ahead and start his story.<br>"Alright. I'll tell you Peter Pan, okay?" Arthur asked before quickly and soothingly kissing his new boyfriend's head before starting the story. "Long ago, just after my days as the British Empire came to an end and just before you became a true super power, there was a little girl named Wendy…" Arthur began his tale, relived when Alfred almost immediately began to relax in his arms. Hopefully he wouldn't be hurting for too much longer.

Mattie sat silently at the bar booth he'd watched his brother's heart get crushed in just over two hours ago. He was now alone with the rather scary Ludwig, who had taken Feliciano and Kiku back to their hotel about an hour ago after they passed out before returning. Mattie, for the thousandth time since Ludwig had gotten back 40 minutes ago, flipped open his phone and checked the time. At that point Ludwig snapped and slammed his boot (of beer) on the table.  
>"Mathew vill you stop that!" He yelled agitated. "I'm sure their fine! Alfred's probably fucking him up the ass and taking his sveet time vith it"!<br>"I know…" Mattie admitted to having the same thought about what was taking his brother so long. "But I'm not leaving until Al comes out and I have a date soon. At this rate I won't even have time to wash. Do I smell like beer, eh?" Mattie asked, not wanting to smell like he should be drunk on his date. He stood and leaned over the table between him and Ludwig, brining his forearm just below the big man's nose.  
>Ludwig leaned back at the sudden closeness, but the innocent look Mattie was giving him said 'I'm not moving till you do it'. So with a small sigh, he leaned forward and took a small sniff of the Canadian's jacket covered arm. Frowning just a little when he smelt beer and a faint hint of vodka on his jacket.<br>"Mattie," Ludwig started, now suspicious as to the identity of the Canadian's date. "Vho is your date?" He asked, raising one blonde eyebrow. A smirk tugged at his lips as he watched Mattie squirm as he sat back down. After a long, uncomfortable pause on Mattie's part, he finally gave Ludwig an answer.  
>"I-Ivan…" He said quietly as a light blush dusted over his cheeks.<br>"I knew it!" Ludwig exclaimed victoriously.  
>"H-how?" Mattie asked, his violet eyes wide with worry. If Ludwig figured it out that fast, maybe Alfred had figured it out over the past three months in which the couple had been dating.<br>"I could smell the vodka on your jacket. Under the beer." Ludwig answered, proud of his amazing detective skills.  
>"Oh…" Mattie sighed a relived sigh. Alfred would never notice something so small. Mattie stared absentmindedly out at the dance floor as a comfortable silence fell between himself and Ludwig. Suddenly, almost out of no where, Alfred and Arthur entered his sight. Alfred appeared comfortable and relaxed for the first time today. He also seemed to be happier than he had been in a long time. Mattie smiled wide when he spotted something he found quite interesting.<br>"Ludwig, look!" He exclaimed happily as pointed out Arthur and his brother to him.  
>"It that Alfred with his hand in Arthur's pocket?" Ludwig asked, looking more surprised than Mattie had ever seen him look.<br>"Maple yeah!" Mattie exclaimed just before the two reached the table. He stood up to throw a big congratulations hug around his twin brother. "I'm so happy for you Alfred". Alfred smiled at Mattie and removed his hand from Arthur's pocket, much to the stuffy man's relief, and gave his twin a big hug. "Yeah dude, I got 'im!" Alfred whispered in his ear proudly, "Cause the hero always gets the girl"! His joke made Mattie giggle and Arthur look at the pair suspiciously. Knowing that all was forgiven between him and his brother, Alfred took in a relaxing breath through his nose so he could smell his brother's scent. The nation always smelt like maple syrup and Alfred had grown to know and love it, but as Alfred released Mattie he noticed something strange mixed with the scent.  
>Before Mattie had the chance to take two steps away, Alfred hooked one arm around his neck and pulled him back. Mattie let out a little yelp at the sudden action, but didn't struggle against Alfred, knowing it was utterly pointless. He just stood still as Alfred sniffed his hair, then his jacket.<br>Just as quickly as Alfred had pulled Mattie in, he pushed him back. "Open your eyes, Mattie." He ordered. Mattie did as he was told and watched in confusion as Alfred looked closely in each eye. "Walk in a strait line." Alfred commanded again. Once again Mattie obeyed, still completely confused.  
>"Alfred?" Arthur asked as he chuckled, "What in the Lord's name are you doing"?<br>"Hush!" Alfred snapped, focused intently on his twin. "Mattie. You're not drunk".  
>"Yeah. Thanks for the observation, bro. But I really have to run. I have plans." Mattie said and made a move towards the door. Before he got very far, he felt a hand grab on to the hood of his jacket. He turned to see a positively evil looking Alfred looking at the ground, the air around him murderous.<br>"Where are you going bro?" He asked, not looking up. A chill ran down Mattie's spine at the tone of Alfred's voice.  
>"U-ummm… Why do you need to know, eh?" He asked, trying to buy himself time to come up with an excuse.<br>"Mathew…" Alfred warned. Mattie's eyes grew wide with fear when Alfred used his full name. That was something he only did when Mattie was about to get in big trouble.  
>"I-I have a-a date…" Mattie squeaked.<br>"With who?" Alfred asked, finally making eye contact with the nation.  
>"R-Russia…" Mattie squeaked again, as quietly as he possibly could. Unfortunately, his brother still heard what he said. He tried to run away, hoping if he ran hard enough and fast enough he could escape Alfred's grasp.<br>"WHAT!" Alfred roared, his eye twitched. Arthur stepped forward, putting a hand on the raging man's shoulder, trying to calm him down. Alfred shook the hand off, blinded by intense anger. He was rooting through all the ways he could kill the bastard who'd tricked his innocent brother into dating him. From there things only got worse as Mathew saw his lover walk through the door. He tried to send brain wave warnings to him to run before Alfred saw him but to no prevail. Ivan had spotted Mattie and was now headed calmly towards him.  
>Not half a minute later, Alfred spotted Ivan. "Oh ho ho. Look who we have here." Alfred chuckled, his voice predator-like. Alfred released Canada's hood and started to storm across the floor to Russia. Mattie trailed behind Alfred, motioning for Ivan to run like hell. Alfred was so mad, he doubted even Ivan and Ludwig working together couldn't reign him in.<br>Seconds later Alfred stood just two feet away from Ivan, who smiled innocently at Alfred. "Hello, comrade Alfred. I came to pick up your brother." He said, his smile never wavering, even as Alfred's face turned a bright, angry red. Mattie hung his head, knowing he just couldn't win now.  
>"YOU BASTARD!" Alfred roared angrily, his entire body tensing as if he was about to pounce. "YOU STAY AWAY FROM HIM!"<br>"I don't think that little Mattie doesn't want me to stay away from him." Ivan said, a big smile still plastered on his face. He hadn't told his brother about himself and Ivan because he knew how Alfred would react and he didn't want either of them to get hurt. So Mattie jump between Ivan and Alfred, just as his brother was about to punch Ivan out.  
>"ALFRED!" He yelled, stopping Alfred in his tracks. "Come on! I know you don't like him! And I know you just wanna protect me! But can't you just deal, eh!" Mattie turned to face Ivan and glared angrily at him. "And you! That's my brother! You will show him respect or you'll never see me again! Do you understand?" Mattie turned once more so he could see both of them. Both of them looked at the floor in shame. "Now I want some damned pancakes and Alfred's gonna take his new boyfriend, and Ludwig will go get Feliciano and we'll all have a maple great time, do you understand, eh!" Mattie yelled at them before walking back towards the table where he left his cell phone, stopping to smile at Arthur and Ludwig on his way back.<br>"I'm sorry about that and I hope that you guys are okay with going out for pancakes! Oh and Arthur, you need to take Alfred to your hotel later, cause I have a feeling this is going to be a long dinner." He said sweetly, smiling wide and bright as the others as they stared at him in wonder. Before following him to the door. Arthur of course stopped to collect a pouting Alfred.  
>"Come on love." Arthur said as he wrapped his arms around his neck to give him a quick kiss. He heard Alfred sigh into the kiss and pulled back to just hold him for a moment. Alfred kissed the top of Arthur's hair and mumbled into it.<br>"It's a damned good thing you're here, cause this is gonna be totally un-heroic." He said. Arthur pulled away to give Alfred a playful smirk.  
>"Well I'll tell you what, love." He said. "If you aren't a total wanker at dinner, I'll take you back to my hotel room and you can spend the night".<br>"Maybe I can be nice to Ivan." Alfred said quickly, a big smile on my face.  
>"Thank you, love." Arthur said as he grabbed Alfred's hand and turned, dragging Alfred out into the street where Mattie and Ivan were waiting. He blushed as he heard Alfred said something along the lines of 'stars and stripes, that's a nice ass'. Alfred smiled and knew that he didn't have to wonder where his hero was anymore. He'd just found him.<p> 


End file.
